The Return of Dorothy's Ex

Exes...Yikes! Break ups are difficult enough when they just involve a person you've known for a few months or so. I don't want to think about the difficulty of dealing with ending a relationship after 38 years! Nevertheless, it's a reality for many people, and it's wise for the writers to focus on that particular subject from time to time (as they do here).

I can't personally relate to a relationship ending after 38 years, but to the extent to which I can relate, I know it would be completely heart-wrenching for me if I were in Dorothy's shoes! Surely after such a long time, two people become reliant upon each other in many ways. Personally, I would feel a great sense of emptiness. I would wonder where to go from that point and how to move on. In all probability, I would cut the person out of my life like a tumor in order to allow myself to heal from it as quickly and painlessly as possible. I'm getting depressed just thinking about the emotional upheaval it would mean for me. I don't know if Dorothy's strength in dealing with Stan is a result of her age (wiser and more grounded), her basic personality, or something else, but she is definitely one tough woman! 

Honestly, Dorothy is a saint for even continuing to speak to Stan, as far as I am concerned. Their son and daughter are grown, so I can't see any need for her to keep in touch with him. In this episode, he seeks her out to help complete some paperwork relating to when they were still married, but she certainly treats him very courteously given that he left her after 38 years without even saying goodbye. In the second episode, we learn that Dorothy only found out about the divorce because Stan's lawyer called to give her the news! Taking that into consideration, the fact that she will take time out of her day to help him fill out paperwork and have lunch with him is very generous on her part!

OK, so maybe Dorothy was a little more than polite to Stan as the evening progressed! The rest of the girls were shocked when they saw Stan walking around the house in Dorothy's night robe the next morning. Really, why wouldn't they be? Sophia handles it like a champ. She makes her opinion on the subject of Dorothy reuniting with Stan very clear, but she does it without being overly forceful. Blanche and Rose are in agreement with Sophia, of course. As friends, they have more leeway when it comes to knocking some sense into Dorothy's head. A mother has to exercise more restraint. I always find it easier to listen to my friends' criticism than to my parents'. Perhaps it's just easier to admit when you're wrong to your friends? I'm not really sure. Regardless, I think each of the girls handles the situation very well. They are all firm, but you never doubt that the girls will all be there for Dorothy no matter what decision she chooses.

No cheesecake...

Stan infuriates me in this episode! In later episodes, he has a few shining moments where I find that I can cut him some slack, but here I think he's a selfish yutz (as Sophia would say)! He just wants someone to be with him. Chrissy left him and so he went right back to Dorothy. He doesn't really love her, though. He is simply afraid to be alone, and he is using Dorothy as a comfortable Plan B. Even when Dorothy refuses him, he runs back to Chrissy. It was (at the very least) somewhat noble of him to pick Dorothy over Chrissy when given the choice, but if he really loved Dorothy, he wouldn't have let her go that easily. Anyway, I think it's frustrating. There's a difference between love/commitment and the fear of being alone. I would want to be with someone because they wanted me, not because the idea of being single frightened them into choosing me!

Interested in another pearl of wisdom from this show? A woman's best friends know more about that woman's boyfriend than he will ever know! That's not just something that's contrived for TV. That's for real! Other than that, the only other comment I have is this: Rose is a truly terrible storyteller, but her stories are so funny that it makes it OK! The whole story of Eddie The Aqua Midget is pretty funny, but Blanche's puns are what make it so completely hysterical! I'm into puns, so maybe it's just me, but it's one of my favorite Rose stories! :)


***Cheesecake count: 1

St. Olaf v. Sicily: 0 to 1

References: Lucille Ball

Quote of the day:

Rose: That's where I first met Eddie The Aqua Midget...I didn't realize it, but he was falling for me.
Blanche: Didn't have far to fall!
Rose: It started with little things.
Blanche: I bet!

The Heart Attack

Death is a common theme on Golden Girls. It will come up a lot throughout the series, but they take a slightly different spin on it each time. It's completely understandable that death is a theme of the show given that the characters are all over 50. As my grandpa said to my father on dad's 50th birthday, "It was when I hit 50 that I realized I probably had more birthdays behind me than ahead of me!" The look on my dad's face was priceless--but I digress! As I said, the show looks at death from a few different angles. This episode evaluates it primarily from a mother-daughter perspective, but Blanche and Rose throw their 2 cents in as well. Naturally, the show does an excellent job of balancing a difficult topic like death with a few hearty laughs. I know I've said it before, but it's really fantastic how the writers of the show can take something like death and make it comical without being irreverent. Obviously, the actresses are a part of making that work, too.

Personally, I find myself thinking of death more often than I think of growing old. I suppose this is because death is an absolute guarantee and being old is less of a certainty than death (but then again, I don't believe there's anything more certain in life than death...). Of course, the girls find themselves thinking of the things that they love most about life and the people that mean the most to them. Betty White does a beautiful job with her interpretation of Rose's feelings towards her late husband Charlie's death. According to the show's timeline, Charlie has been dead for 15 years. The story of how Charlie passed away is actually very fitting for Rose's character and very funny...you'll have to check that part out for yourself if you haven't already! ;) Regardless, Rose tells the story in a way that's funny but completely heartwarming and she only tears up slightly at the very  end. I think it's the golden moment of this episode, really (pun intended as always! Haha). While Rose is remembering the difficulty of losing someone close to her, Dorothy is grappling with the fact that she may lose her mother very soon. She notes that this is upsetting not simply because she will be losing someone she loves, but also because she will be an orphan. Plus, she has the additional fear that the loss of one's parents "pushes you up to the front of the line." Losing your parents seems like a bit of a trifecta of fear: loss of a loved one, becoming an orphan, and realizing that you're probably next. I'm not looking forward to crossing that bridge...let's move on to some concepts that are less depressing!

Listening to Blanche and Rose discuss how they want to be buried once they're dead is great! I love their ideas about the afterlife, too! Blanche is obsessed with whether or not there are men in heaven, and Rose reveals that she believes there to be separate heavens for each denomination. Sophia just wants them to shut up, of course, but she does tell the girls how much she loves them. She also tells Dorothy that she is her favorite child--a claim that she retracts immediately when she discovers that she's not actually having a heart attack and will, in fact, be fine. This makes me wonder, though, do parents really have favorites? They always say they don't, but...I guess I'll find out someday for myself! :)

So what about all of that food?! Overeating caused Sophia to feel sick to her stomach. Understandably, the doctor scolds her for overeating, but I think at her age...who cares? She's over 80! I say, if you've made it that far then you may as well just throw all caution to the wind, as it were. Additionally, I find it very annoying that (once again) they have a boat load of food and not a single piece of cheesecake in sight. In later seasons of the show, it shows up in almost every episode! Oh well...we'll get there. Finally, I just love how the girls almost use death as an excuse to gorge themselves on chocolate cake! It's something that I've thought of plenty of times! You never know when your last meal is going to be...do you really want it to be a watercress salad?

***Cheesecake count: 1

St. Olaf vs. Sicily: 0 to 1

References:
Princess Di and Pavarotti

Quote of the day:

Blanche: I want to lie in state and then be buried in Arlington Cemetery.
Rose: Why Arlington Cemetery?
Blanche: 'Cause it's full of men!