That Was No Lady

I have a lot of opinions about this episode. It gets me pretty worked up, so brace yourself!

For those of you who have been following the blog for a while, you know by now that it's fairly common for the show to feature two plots in one epsiode: a main plot and a secondary plot. Well, this episode is no exception. I've decided to tackle the secondary plot first because it is far less convoluted than the main plot and it's not really comical enough to justify making it the theme of my closing commentary (I generally like to close on a lighter note when I can because I feel that this is more reflective of the ebb and flow of the show itself).

In the secondary plot, Blanche is trying to convince Rose to buy her old car so that Blanche can use the money to purchase a new car for herself. The car is in poor condition, but Blanche is planning to take advantage of Rose anyway. Although there are some funny aspects to this subplot, it's actually a little unsettling to me that Blanche is OK with deceiving one of her dearest and most trusting friends. It seems wrong to me. Of course, Blanche does the right thing in the end and confesses the truth to Rose, but in a real life situation, it would take me a while to truly trust Blanche again if I were in Rose's position. In fact, I think Rose is very forgiving of Blanche's little trick. Blanche is lucky that Rose is so generous in that way!

The main plot is more than just unsettling to me--it's upsetting and at times even infuriating. Dorothy is having an affair with a married man (Glenn). Initially, she was involved with him for 3 weeks before she learned that he was married, but she doesn't let that stop her from continuing to see him. The only person with whom I do not have a bone to pick in this episode is Sophia. All of the other characters disappoint me in some way or another during the course of the episode. In the interest of efficiency, I will address my issues with each character individually and in the reverse order of the gravity of their offences.

Rose (The least upsetting to me):
I think Rose could be a much better friend to Dorothy in this situation. While I fully agree with her that Dorothy should not be involved with a married man, I think that her approach is unnecessarily harsh. If one of my best friends said, "Evil is as evil does" to me, I would have terribly hurt feelings! Rose is condescending toward Dorothy in a very "holier than thou" style that just rubs me the wrong way. As one of her best friends, she should certainly encourage Dorothy to make the right decision, but her methodology is all wrong. Sophia is equally hard on Dorothy, but it's different when one's mother is harsh than when it's one's best friend. Mothers can get away with being harsh because it's their job. Friends should know better.

Blanche:
Blanche is enabling Dorothy and being a poor friend. For starters, Blanche's assertion that sometimes we have to "grab our happiness where we can get it" irks me in a major way. I can't approve of actively "grabbing your happiness" at the expense of another man's wife. It's selfish and cruel. Moreover, Blanche is supposed to be Dorothy's friend. A good friend wants the best for you, and I fail to see how being a married man's secret girlfriend constitutes the best possible relationship for Dorothy. Blanche should want Dorothy to be in a healthy, loving, trusting relationship with a man who is as good as his word. It's worth mentioning that Blanche has never had an affair with a married man even though they often imply otherwise in other episodes throughout the series.

Dorothy:
Dorothy knows better and I get very disappointed with her when she continues to see Glenn. People wouldn't cheat if they couldn't find such willing counter parts. It's one thing when Dorothy truly doesn't know that Glenn is marred, but once she learns of it, that should be the end right then and there. After all, her husband was unfaithful, too! She knows how much it hurts to be betrayed by someone whom you've come to love and respect and trust for so long. Even when she is with Glenn, she isn't happy. She feels guilty and ashamed of herself. That doesn't sound like happiness to me--nonetheless a relationship that could ever become something meaningful! I think Rose and Blanche represent different aspects of Dorothy's psyche as she struggles with her choices. Rose reflects the awful guilt that Dorothy is feeling and Blanche represents the rationalization of that guilt.

Glenn and Dorothy

Glenn (The jerk)
Here is a man who is an outright dirty liar and a selfish one at that! He starts out by lying to Dorothy and his wife simultaneously. Eventually, he tells Dorothy the truth, but not until she's so hooked that it's difficult for her to refuse him. All that crap about how he "loves her" is such a crock. If he really loved her, he would be with her. If his marriage with his wife was really over, it would be in the legal sense, too. Dorothy calls him out when she tells him that he just wants to have it both ways--and she is absolutely right! He wants the excitement of a new romance without giving up the life he's become comfortable living. Basically, I have very little respect for anyone who can look someone who loves and trusts them in the eyes and lie to them like it's nothing.

OK, stepping down from the soap box here, I do want to talk about the show's lovely ending. Naturally, Dorothy stops seeing Glenn, but the sweetest thing is how it goes over with the rest of the girls. Sophia and Dorothy have such an understanding and she handles Dorothy's final decision with such grace! Not one of the girls tries to scold Dorothy or congratulate her or anything--they just listen and act like supporting, loving friends! I think this really redeems them from earlier in the episode when they were busy enabling or being overly harsh. They are happy to sit and sulk with Dorothy if that's what she needs to feel better, and they are equally happy to get her out of the house and distract her if that's what she truly needs. I call that being a good friend! :)

One final note! When Rose is on the phone to Dorothy's boss at the the school (Mr. Yamamoto),  you get a glimpse into a few preconceived notions about Japanese people during the 1980's. She says, "I'd expect you to be fair, and polite, and good at math!" I just find it interesting because I feel that in 2011, that comment may be perceived as racist and offensive. Of course, Rose is almost always well-meaning, but it still stood out to me. Also, I like that she refers to the Tokyo Disneyland as Dinseyland and not Disney World. Too often people get those mixed up! There is only one Disney World, folks! All the other places are Disneyland. Let's keep it straight! ;)

***
Cheesecake count: 1

St. Olaf vs. Sicily: 0 to 1

References: The Amazing Kreskin, Jesse Owens

Quote of the day:

Dorothy: We spent the evening at a motel.

Rose: A motel? Dorothy! A cheap, tawdry, bare-balled den of iniquity?

Dorothy: We didn't drive to Sodom and Gomorrah, Rose!